| OOC: This? Is spam. |
[17 Sep 2019|11:05am] |
So. How does this become canon?
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[31 Jul 2019|11:48pm] |
To Do:
Narrative: 1960s.
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[23 Apr 2016|02:49am] |
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( Bio )
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| Contact Post |
[30 Apr 2011|12:11am] |
QUESTIONS? COMMENTS? CONCERNS? LOVE? INTENSE HATRED?
Do tell. Comments screened!
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[12 Jul 2010|12:21am] |
There is the chance that Miss Lohan may be court ordered to complete an intensive drug rehabilitation and therapy program while incarcerated. If ordered to do so she would almost certainly have to serve the full ninety days to complete the program and get the most out of it possible. I have resolved, I believe, to go out to California for awhile if she does serve the entire ninety days. I'd like this rehabilitation to stick, so to say, and if my closer proximity will help it then so be it.
In the meantime, I should find other useful activities for myself. Idle hands, you know. I spend too little time counseling and visiting the centers lately, and I'd made myself a promise that I would find new places to volunteer as well. It's not fair to those in recovery if I don't spread my attentions to include them all, though I hesitate to ask in such a forum as this, if anyone knows of any places that could particularly use my presence. I feel as if my own prejudices and biases keep me from certain centers and I know that's wrong. Perhaps an outside eye would help to expand my horizons, at least until I travel to California.
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[06 Jul 2010|08:35pm] |
I don't understand the need to broadcast Miss. Lohan's sentencing across all forms of media for the entirety of the day. The young lady is obviously in dire need of help, and I am sure that in time she will come to see this as a blessing. However, that's not going to happen with the flare of a camera lense in her eyes and a microphone shoved in her face. Like all addicts, she needs time to accept the consequences of her actions. You should all be ashamed of not letting her do that, just ashamed.
I'm looking forward to welcoming her back into my arms.
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[21 Jun 2010|11:51pm] |
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There are new AA groups starting up around the city, at least two in each of the burroughs. Please do let me know if you think it might be something you're interested in or that you need. Privately, of course, and I promise to keep your confidence. Don't let fear or embarrassment stop you from getting the help you need. Your sponsor is waiting for you!
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[18 Jun 2010|11:13pm] |
I've been busy and fearing an internet addiction coming on I took it upon myself to stay away from the computer, but I feel that it's safe to turn it on again. Of course I've just picked up cigarettes again instead. Ah well.
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| [OOC] |
[10 Jun 2010|11:09pm] |
Well now that I've requested one, I feel like I need to offer them up and jump on the bandwagon!
Drabbles. You should request them, because writing is fun and awesome, and I like ideas! So, I will offer...
The Democratic Party (![[info]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) allamericanboy)
Jesse James (gotawaywithit)
Rehabilitation (revolvingdoor)
Salvia (magicmint)
Feel free to ask for meetings between characters or just to provide random prompts like 'Mark + Apple'. I'll work with what I'm given!
( Mark/Gladys )
( Salvia/Rehab )
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[27 Feb 2010|12:43am] |
There is almost always an underlying issue when it comes to the question of self-harming and suicidal behaviors. I don't think I've ever seen a case where a certain sort of music was legitimately a trigger and cause of suicide. And I've certainly never experienced it myself... Still, I understand the argument. Parents worry and I can't imagine what it would be like to suffer such a loss as people are describing, but still...
Ah well. I'm quite positive it will all blow over eventually. Such a fuss people are working themselves into! It's as if we've forgotten living through Elvis' hips!
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[29 Jan 2010|06:24pm] |
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It's been just over four weeks. A short stint in Drug Rehab, but a stint none-the-less. I needed it, and it's over now. I'm thankful for it, and I never want to think of it again.
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[10 Dec 2009|11:40pm] |
He tried to sleep with me, but I stopped him. I didn't realise it was supposed to hurt so much the first time.
He used his tongue instead.
someone help me.
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[18 Nov 2009|03:08pm] |
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I believe I finally understand why people are always smoking after sex on television shows and in movies. It's glorious! I'm going to have another.
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[08 Nov 2009|12:34am] |
I've never transformed but not transformed. I'm still myself this time. I wake up each morning and I recognise the person I see. I'm very much myself and I don't feel very much different than any other time of day or year. I haven't at all turned into that black haired harlot that I'm used to and that reassures me slightly. I can't be a bad person or an addicted one if I'm still just myself. Blonde and blue eyes and a proper weight. I haven't felt myself devolve into that other persona. And if I prattle on about it then perhaps it will be actually be true.
What's different then?
I don't know how to talk about it in polite company-- or, internet company, as it is-- but now everything is different. I feel as if for the first time I can experience things. Throughout the past few weeks I've opened myself up to several experiences that I never would have in the past. I've never felt like this before. I didn't know what this mortal form was capable of, and I suppose that maybe I thought that my form in particular wasn't capable of any of it. I've abstained for so long and then when I began I was completely ashamed of myself. It's taken until now that I can be comfortable with the fact that I-- well, I'm still not sure of how to talk about it in polite company.
Something that feels so good can't possibly be such a sin, can it? I imagine it's even better when you're... when you're with someone. Is that right? So many new things to see, hear, feel...
Dare I say that I'm excited? And to think, I'd deprived myself. To think that it took someone else sending me a present for me to realise where I'd gone wrong. Isn't that the perverse thing of it all?
There's no better way to spend my time right now. It's glorious and wonderful and I've never felt so pleased!
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[16 Oct 2009|04:55pm] |
I sense the feeling that between the upcoming nuptials and the fact that all four of them have returned to the city, that others expect for me to simply fall apart at the seams. Maybe that's why it's happening. Well, as much as I hate to disappoint, that won't happen. I've been living a relatively quiet life of late. My, I think the most exciting thing to happen here lately was my washer finally breaking down a few days back. I've had to order in a new one the description said 'silent'. I imagine that would indicate that I won't be able to... use it anymore. and the Maytag gentleman should be over soon to deliver and install it. I asked them to rush the process, as I do have laundry to do after all.
( Private )
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[01 Oct 2009|07:29pm] |
So, all Four have returned to the city. That's fine. The rest of us will just have to work harder and that's what will happen.
I've never been in a city where the four of them are living. I'm already falling and-- Drat.
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[25 Sep 2009|09:40am] |
[Private]
That is what I've been holding myself back from for years? Pleasure? Nothing but sheer, fleeting pleasure? Thirty seconds of bliss only to come back down wanting more.
Yes, that's what I want. More. But even as I admit that, I wonder... why haven't I changed?
[/Private]
Wash, rinse, tumble-dry, repeat. There's nothing quite as satisfying as a day of laundry.
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[20 Sep 2009|02:33pm] |
When you possess an addictive personality everything is a potential trap. It's something those who've never been addicts ever have to think about. Every little thing can trigger a thought that drags a person back to where they were before. You could walk down the street and catch whiff of a smell that reminds you of that chemical you once loved. A bad talk with a friend could drive you back to a drug that you once thought soothed all your ills. A spoonful of cough medicine could remind you that just three more spoonfuls will send you... somewhere far away, just for a little while. A household chore like laundry might-- Sometimes I find myself sucking on the end of a pen as I write my grocery lists and wishing for a cigarette, an indulgence I often find myself longing.
The key is having the strength of will and fortitude to say no in the end. 'No' is simple, it's the power to keep saying it that's impressive and hard to achieve. Once you realise how good something feels it's hard to let go.
What is wrong with me?
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